Books For Toddlers and Young Children in Blended Families
- Aug 3, 2018
- 4 min read
Updated: Feb 19, 2019
Many blended families form when children are older and already understand the concepts of shared custody and step-parents. But what about families (like mine) that form when children are very young? How do you explain to your toddler or young child what a step-parent is or why they have to go back and forth between two homes?
One of the things that really helped my step-daughter adjust when my husband and I married were books! There are a ton of children's books out there on step-parents, blended families, "non-traditional" families, shared custody and the like. However, we quickly realized that very few of these books were age-appropriate or relatable for younger children.
After dozens of duds, we finally found a solid selection of books that not only accurately reflected our family's dynamic but also caught the attention of my young step-daughter. Below are our favorite books on step-parents, blended families, and "non-traditional" families. None of these books address divorce, so they are appropriate for children of divorced or never-married parents! Even though we love them, I urge you to read them for yourself first to make sure they are appropriate for your little one as everyone's family is different!
Books for Toddlers and Younger Children about Step Parents and Shared Custody
1.Two Homes, by claire masurel
This book is a must have. This is by far my favorite book and is especially well suited for toddlers and preschool age children. With only a few words on each page and large colorful illustrations, even the youngest of children can understand and relate to this book.
The story is about a little boy named Alex who has two homes. The book does not talk about the relationship between his parents or how much time he spends at each of his homes, but instead focuses on the fact that his mommy and daddy love him wherever he is. We knew this book was a winner when my stepdaughter started pointing to the little boy in the book and saying "That's Elle! Elle has two homes like Alex!" Now that Elle is older, this book has evoked a lot of thoughtful questions from Elle about her two homes and she now insists we read the book as if she is Alex and it is written about her life.
2. The Family Book, by todd parr
Another must have book! While this book is not specifically about shared custody or having two homes, this book talks about families of all shapes and sizes.
A simple read with few words and fun, vibrant illustrations, this book is great for even young toddlers. This book depicts families with one parent, stepparents, same sex parents, stepsiblings, and more. It shows children that there are many ways to be a family, but that every family is special!
3. I Have a Stepmom, by collen lemaire
This book begins with a little girl's dad meeting a "beautiful girl" who he later asks to marry him. The little girl gets to be the flower girl at the wedding and the "beautiful girl" becomes her stepmom. I love this book because it talks about the role of a stepmom without diminishing the role of little girl's real mother. It also subtly conveys that the little girl is not being disloyal to her real mother by having fun with or loving her stepmom.
This is another book that will work for children in any blended household as there is no reference to whether the little girl's parents were ever married. While the illustrations in this book are large and colorful, this book is a little wordier and delves into some of the feelings experienced by the little girl so it might not keep the attention of younger toddlers.
This book is part of an "I Have" series which includes an I Have a Stepdad and I Have Two Homes books. We initially ordered the I Have Two Homes book, but it references the failed marriage of the little girl's mother and father so it wasn't really relatable for my stepdaughter and I returned it. I have not read the I Have a Stepdad book but I imagine it is very similar to this one and would definitely check it out if you're looking for stepdad books.
4. My Super Stepmom, by nicole bauer
I debated on whether or not to include this book because it's not the greatest quality book and it's very short. That said, I decided to put it on the list because it is my stepdaughter's absolute favorite and she asks me to read it again and again.
The plot is simple and there is no background story about the parents or stepmom, this book simply talks about the fun things a stepmom and a stepdaughter can do together. I think one of the reasons my stepdaughter likes this book so much is it's incredibly simple and upbeat.
Don't say I didn't warn you about the quality of this book - it's really short, half of the pages are blank, and the pictures look like they could have been printed on your home printer. I really wanted to return it based on quality alone but my husband pointed out that it was important we had one book that focused solely on the fun, happy side of having a stepparent and he was right. By focusing on happiness and fun, this book definitely helps mitigate the negative connotations that often surround being a big bad "step" parent.
Comment below with your thoughts or more book suggestions!
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